Words of Wisdom from the December Issue of Cosmo

So, I stopped subscribing to Cosmo earlier this year, but when Adam needed to use up some points for some survey club he's in he re-subscribed me. So now I am the recipient of many, many hot and naughty tips on various subjects. Woo.

In the December issue I got yesterday, there were a few things that attracted my attention. Firstly, apparently I'm not the only one hooked on the food channel. Cosmo tells me "these days, lots of women are clicking on the Food Network to relax." "Viewing someone prepare a meal..comforts us." Good to know I'm semi-normal on that one.

Secondly, there is a whole article entitled "What Smart Girlfriends Never Do." Dr. Keith Ablow, a psychiatrist and talk show host, shares his seven biggest no-no's for couples who are too comfortable around each other. Hmm. Let's just say that according to this guy, I'm a really dumb girlfriend.

#1: Giving Gifts his Mom Would Buy: Gist: Don't buy him clothes. Honestly, I've never bought him underwear. But most of the gifts I do get him are of the clothing sort. He always needs clothes and he almost always asks me to come along when he buys them for himself. What's so wrong with buying clothing for your SO?
#2: Flossing Together: Gist: Don't let your SO see you do personal maintenance. Let him believe you look the way you do with no effort whatsoever. And never, NEVER, go to the bathroom with the door open. *sigh* So I'm a total loser on this one. I've sat around on the couch with the scary green face mask and the biore pore-cleaning strips on. I pee in front of him all the time (and he returns the favor.) What's wrong with that? I think it's a good thing when two people are that comfortable with each other. Sure, it removes some "mystery" but come on, everyone pees. Or is that everyone poops. I forget.
#3: Drifting into a Sex Rut: No comment. This is a family blog. Bwahahahaha.
#4: Baring All, All the Time: Gist: Don't walk around the house naked. This doctor even says he'd go as far as to say that you should never see your SO getting dressed. Undressing only. Pfft. Sometimes being naked is just more comfortable. But I'm less of an offender on this one than Adam is.
#5: Flaunting your Flaws: Gist: You are perfect. Don't let them see you're not. What a bunch of hooey. Everyone has issues. Eventually they're going to see them. Why try and hide what's obvious anyway?
#6: Dressing Down, Down, Down: Gist: Don't fall into a flannel nightgown rut. And don't put your sexy undies in the laundry basket where he can see them. Pfft. I've got nothing to say about this one. I like my SpongeBob pjs. So there.
#7: Spending Every Night Together: Gist: Too much togetherness=bad. Since we live together we kind of have to see each other every day. And there's nothing wrong with that. With Adam working and my IMA stuff, there are times we don't spend time together. Whew, at least I got one right!

Yeah, so obviously this Dr. Ablow is an idiot who probably isn't married. Who would want to be with a guy who only wants to see the perfect you and only wants you naked if you're going to have sex with him. What an ass.

Thank you Cosmo for these wonderful bits of information. :)