Saturday, March 26, 2005

I've got no creative title for this one...

He brought me flowers last night. Not roses or anything like that. Just normal spring-like flowers. He told me he tried to get as much purple as possible. Because I like the color purple.



What kind of "friend" gets someone flowers? Especially a guy. Guys aren't really known for their incredible ability to do nice things for girls they aren't trying to get with. Perhaps that's a statement drawn from my experiences with the lower rungs of the male gender, but I still stand behind it. This guy is altogether too nice. Although he does do things that annoy me. Like call me when he's in the middle of doing something so he's constantly distracted or talking to someone else in the background. If you can't give me your undevoted attention, don't call me! Call me later when you can focus completely on me. It's my generally selfish nature to desire to always be the center of attention. Grrr. It's so obnoxious.

I found a ticklish spot on his elbow last night. Heh. It was fun. I swear there isn't a part of that guy's body that ISN'T ticklish. He's so much fun. :) Like an amusement park.

He also got Spongebob car seat covers. Why?!? I don't get it. Why is this so difficult. Oh yeah, because we're both wusses! Woo!

Anyway, there is indeed more to life than him. Things are going well with the job and the car and life in general is pretty good. I got a jacket this week from the plant I work for. I'm all official now that I have a piece of clothing with the company name on it, right? Picture is in my photobucket album.

I ordered my new glasses on Thursday so I should be able to see without getting splitting headaches in about a week. And if my new glasses make me look dumb, I'm going to blame Adam. I decided against contacts since I apparently have weird shaped eyes (thanks mom and dad) and I'm so used to glasses anyway I think it would be odd not having them. Plus they make me look smarter. :) This time I didn't get the transitions lenses, so that will be an adjustment. I'll have to find some sunglasses. I also got titanium flexible frames so they're really light and won't break when (I mean IF) I step on them. They're all bendy. :) This is a good thing, knowing how clutzy I am.

Other than that, not much is going on. No big plans or anything. I'm just drifting through life right now. It's fun. :)

Friday, March 18, 2005

It's the alcohol talking...

Ok, that title line is a slight exaggeration. I mean, I've only had 2 beers tonight. Granted I've put myself on a 1,200 calorie diet because I'm FREAKIN' FAT so perhaps the alcohol will affect me more than usual. One can only hope. Did you know that there are 96 calories in a bottle of Miller Lite? Ugh!

Yes. I'm fat. But feeling wonderful about my fatness because Adam tells me I'm not fat. Yeah, whatever.

Anyway, nothing much is happening here lately except for snow and more snow, melting snow, slushy snow, big puddles in the parking lot because of snow. Ugh. When is spring going to arrive? Any day now would be quite alright with me.

Adam invited me to have Easter dinner with his family next weekend. Ok, he actually said that his mother suggested that he invite me but that he was ok with the idea as well. Now what does that mean? Argh! This guy talks more about the future (and not just the relatively near future) than any other guy I've ever known. He talks about how we should go camping up in Door County this summer. About how we should take vacation time from work at the same time so we can fly somewhere using his frequent flier miles. About how when my birthday (finally!!) falls on a weekend in like 2007, we should go out somewhere so I can get free endless beer. I mean really. 2007?!? It's barely 2005. *Sigh* I don't know what to do with him. Ok, yeah, I have some ideas but that's not really something I want to get into here...mind wandering...aaaaaaaahhhhh!.

Back to the subject at hand. I know, the easiest thing to do would just to broach the subject myself since apparently he has no intentions of bringing it up. It would be so much easier if I could read his mind. This is much more likely to turn out the way I'd like it to than the whole John thing was. I mean, this guy calls me. A lot. This guy takes me out places. In public. A lot. This guy doesn't have three kids. This guy isn't a psychotic loser. He has lots of things going for him. Sometimes I wish he weren't so adorable though. Ugh. I look at his eyes and I just melt. This is not good. Or is it? I don't know.

Anyway, Kmart scheduled me 6 hour days this weekend. Great. After scheduling me 10 hours in the last 3 weeks combined they suddenly decide to pile it on this weekend. It sucks. I don't want to work that much. And next weekend they have me there for 11. Ridiculous. At least they're not absolutely horrible hours. They're bearable and still leave me with time to have some fun. Poor Adam. I sure do like my fun. Hey, does that count as exercise? We were having this conversation (while we were both at work...oops...) this afternoon. I said it probably depended on how it was done. I suggested that he bench-press me...work his muscles...or perhaps prop me against the wall. He just told me to shut-up (nicely, of course) because he didn't want to be in an "uncomfortable position" for the remainder of his day. Who knew I could have such an effect on someone? >:)

But I'm sure that was a whole lot more than any of you wanted to know. :)

Sunday, March 13, 2005

Big Sigh

So Friday was his birthday. As I understood it, the original plans involved me being his designated driver while he partied at various bars with various friends. What actually happened was we went to dinner, went to one bar alone, and I freaked out on the way home because I hate driving in snow and he ended up driving back to Oshkosh instead of me. Ugh. Stupid weather. I'm not sure what caused the change in plans, but whatever. It was fun anyway. He spent most of yesterday here too, just lazing around and watching movies. I got him Ladder 49 for his birthday and after I made him sit through How to Make an American Quilt (ie: very girly, man-bashing movie), I sat through his macho, fire-fighting, yet very depressing movie. It wasn't really as bad as I had anticipated. So that was good.

I'm still not sure what's going on. I know as a female I inherantly overthink things and find meanings in things that guys do when they actually mean nothing by them at all. Although this guy is particularly weird. He watched American Idol with me and it was kind of his idea. That's just odd. Anyway, back to things he's doing. At this point he has a toothbrush in my bathroom. He got a keychain that holds a picture and he's asked for a small picture of me to put into it. The other side of the keychain is a mirror so when he opens it up, he'd see me and him. The other night at the comedy club when the comedian made some crack about single people and asked if anyone in the crowd was single, he didn't clap or do anything of that sort. I don't know what to think.

On the other hand, I keep making comments about how I don't like dating and I constantly bash kids. It's almost uncontrollable now. I don't know why I do it. I don't think I would mind dating him. At this point, it's almost like I'm dating him anyway. It depends on one's definition of dating though. I don't see anyone else or do anything with anyone else. I don't really want to either. It's not like I don't have the opportunities. He did mentioned the fact that he noticed that he's the only one in his family to carry on his last name so he'd better have at least one kid - a boy. I'm not sure that's really a good reason to have kids. Sense of obligation or whatever that would be. But to each their own. He's also mentioned he has no plan to get married for at least another 5 or 6 years. I was going to comment that he might want to find the person to marry first and THEN start planning the actual wedding but I think that would have opened up some other topics of conversation.

I think I might be sending him mixed messages in that I thoroughly enjoy being with him and I think he's aware of that but I say things that might give him the idea that I don't want to be tied down to someone or date anyone. I always emphasize my desire for independence. That doesn't mean I want to be alone. Just not smothered. I don't want to become a Mrs. John Doe. I don't know. Man this sucks.

Wednesday, March 09, 2005

Hey, Adam

So, he said something last night that leads me to believe that perhaps he looks at my website and perhaps even reads this blog. If this is the case, for the love of whatever you want to love, take the steps to relieve me of my confusion!!! AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!

In other news, I've spent my last few days in really boring training sessions. I'm looking forward to the comedy club tomorrow (we're going because he got a free ticket for his birthday or something...) His birthday is Friday, so it should be an interesting weekend. I hope. He hopes. We hope. :)

Ok, I figured it out



Ha ha! So there! I figure out how to post pictures! The original picture is kind of huge so it looks weird sized. Oh well.

In any case, there is my new car (and me.) It was already pretty dirty though because of the stupid snow. Grrr. And stupid melting snow. Grrr again.

That's really all I intended to do in this post. I've got to get to work soon. More later. I'm sure.

Sunday, March 06, 2005

And the night plays on

Ok, I know this is probably a bad idea since I already posted once tonight slightly intoxicated and now I'm attempting to post again, a few hours (and more than a few beers) later. But here goes. I just wanted to let everyone know that pictures of my new car have now been posted on my website. Oh yeah, and the picture of the hideous hickey I got today is there too. *sigh* men...

Also, I stepped on my glasses today and they're bent to hell. Great...

Aaah, the confusion

OK, I don't get it. He came over last night, we rented some movies, he fell asleep during the movie (Meet the Parents), he woke up, other activities ensued, and eventually he camped out on the futon while I slept in my bed. This is not problem as he snores like a lumberjack and runs the risk of smothering me in my sleep since he rolls around erratically. I much prefer my big bed and my non life-threatening stuffed animals. Anyway, today I slept until about 10 and then I moved out into the living room where he was watching the movie we watched last night (ok, so the movie I watched last night and he fell asleep during last night.) We actually watched the whole movie this time. After that we watched the second movie we rented (The Waterboy) while I did my laundry. Once again, other activities distracted us from watching the whole movie in one sitting. Then we walked for about an hour and a half over to Wal-Mart and back and he put RainX on my car while I made dinner. While we were walking, he brought up the subject of his most recent girlfriend. At least I think she was his girlfriend. I'm not sure. When I first met him, it was right before he started seeing her. I know her because I work with her at Kmart and she was asking me all kinds of questions about him. Apparently the reason he stopped talking to me all of the sudden was because she didn't want him talking to me because she saw me as a threat. Why did he tell me this? Did he see me as a threat as well? At that point I really had no interest in him. When she asked me if I would ever consider dating him, I said no - he was too tall for me. I also really didn't know him that well. Apparently that wasn't good enough for her and she forbade him from talking to me. But when I got the internet back at my house and he started talking to me again he indicated that he was still seeing her. But he was seeing other people as well. As was she. This confused me. I mean, I'm no professional at this whole dating and relationships thing, but I think if you bother to call someone a girl/boyfriend, it seems to me that you should see some kind of future with the person and have some kind of exclusivity clause. If you're going to fuck around with numerous people, why bother "dating?" UGH!

I just don't get it.

I think it's been made extraordinarily clear to him that there are other guys out there that want me. I mean, 3 or 4 guys have been messaging me constantly - while he's here. It's not like he doesn't know that I'm blowing them all off to be with him. And if he hasn't noticed, he's denser than I thought. But I'll give him the benefit of the doubt. Tonight he experienced - how should I say it - some "performance anxiety" - which he blamed on his cousin. His cousin called him last night after returning home from a date that didn't go too well. I told him it didn't really bother me too much. It's not like I get off from that anways - which brought up an entirely different subject. Uck! In any case, he left about an hour ago under the pretense that he has to lector at church tomorrow and needs his sleep. Yeah. Ok. He called me about 10 minutes ago to tell me that he has the biggest hard-on ever right now. Like I want to know that? MEN!!!

I apologize if this post makes no sense. I've been drinking a bit tonight. And with that, I bid this post adieu.

Thursday, March 03, 2005

Interpreting Male Actions

Ok, so I'll be the first to admit I have no idea what guys think about at any point of their lives. I don't know why they do or don't do certain things. I have absolutely no expertise in that area at all and have no right to try and explain these things. That's why I'm putting this out here for those of you that might have the inside scoop (ie: you guys out there.)

We went bowling last night. He calls me up around 6 and says, "Wanna go bowling?" I ask who else will be there and his first response is "As long as I'M there, does it matter who else comes?" Then he responded that a few of his friends would be there as well as his cousin. Ok. This would be a good chance to meet a few of "his people" and see how he reacts to me when in the company of other people. People he knows. We were originally going to stop by his grandma's house (where his cousin lives) for a bit before heading over to the bowling alley, but when he came to pick me up I distracted him a little...ahem...so we were running a little late...We still stopped by to pick his cousin up, but I didn't meet his grandma. She sounded nice though. :)

Aside from the constant references to the fun they had while they were wasted and the boring conversations about every sport imaginable and how they were going to kick each other's asses at them all, his friends seem pretty nice. They all seem to work at Wal-mart too. They all seem to be younger than he is too, which is kind of...I don't know. We had fun and I almost won the first game. I beat everyone but his cousin...and he pulled that one out of his ass in the last frame with a strike.

I don't know how to interpret his actions throughout the evening. I don't know if I should. He introduced me as "some girl from Oshkosh." His cousin seemed to know I existed previously. When I would go bowl, he (not his cousin) would take my chair and then have me sit on his lap. At one point, he flipped me over and just started making out with me, picking me up off the ground. He snuck up behind me and slapped my butt (really hard, I might add. That hurts!) when I was about the throw the ball. Randomly throughout the evening he'd pinch my butt...or grab my boob...or pick me up and kiss me...I don't know what that was all about. We left before anyone else did and on the way home he stated he didn't really like the fact that these random people (his cousin's wal-mart co-workers) showed up and joined our game. I thought he knew everyone there, but apparently there were 4 people there he didn't know.

I don't know how to react to this stuff. I don't know if he's just doing this to show people that he can get some or whether he does it because he likes me and it's fun...I suppose I'll have to ask him eventually.